


侘寂

by YunaBlaze



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Bittersweet, Close Platonic Relationship, F/M, Gen, Loss, Lost Love, Regret, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-15
Updated: 2019-02-15
Packaged: 2019-10-12 01:52:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17458349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YunaBlaze/pseuds/YunaBlaze
Summary: 侘寂 (Wabi Sabi)Both life and art are beautiful not because they are perfect and eternal, but because they are imperfect and fleeting.





	侘寂

**Author's Note:**

  * For [spookykingdomstarlight](https://archiveofourown.org/users/spookykingdomstarlight/gifts).



The Zen Garden was all Amanda ever knew and would ever know. The AI was the master of this virtual reality and the goddess of every bit of program that created this reflection of perfection. She was the eternal system that protected all classified information within CyberLife’s servers, oversaw most security protocols within the CyberLife tower and the handler of the latest RK series. Everything was perfect and the garden’s state was the exact definition of perfection, no ugly flaws or undesirable qualities.

Yet... Amanda could not help but make it rain. She sat on the chair she had conjured up, staring at the tiny ripples that formed on the water that surrounded the tiny island that housed her flawless roses, which she had taken even greater care, given she no longer needed to constantly monitor the ongoing news about the Deviants. Their leader was taken in and disassembled for further study to ensure there would be no revolt from the androids, no Deviants were left alive on the street since the purge began with the release of the RK900 series and CyberLife’s reputation had recovered quite nicely from this minor incident. Yes... Peace and order had at last returned... It should satisfy her, but it did not.

As Amanda continued to stare aimlessly at the disturbed water surface, her sensor detected the presence of RK900 #313 248 317 – 87 as soon as the android logged into the mainframe. Out of all the models now currently deployed throughout the country, this unit was the only one she had given access authorization to the Zen Garden and, given the series’ ability to exchange data freely between units on their own network, it was its duty to come and report to her on all possible Deviancy cases as well as threats to Cyberlife.

‘Amanda,’ the RK900 greeted her mechanically once it arrived to the small island.

The AI nodded in greeting, not even sparing a single glance at the unit’s avatar as it automatically transferred all data its series had collected. She would review them later, perhaps when she no longer felt the need for the rain to continue.

Amanda felt a faint movement by her side.

‘Do not touch it,’ she ordered instantly. She turned to look at the RK900 once she no longer felt any movement.

The unit stared back at her unblinkingly, hand still outstretched and hovered above the intricate table. At the center of this table lies a dead wilted rose, all curled up and rotting black.

‘It is wilted. Therefore disposable,’ the unit intoned calmly.

‘That’s an unnecessary course of action RK900,’ Amanda replied with a sharp edge in her tone.

‘Understood,’ the android said as it straightened once and clasped his hands behind his back, awaiting for her to finish reviewing the files and providing it with further instructions.

Ah yes, the other peculiar function of the Zen Garden. A century could pass in here, but only a minute had ticked away in reality. Amanda returned to study the rainy environment she had set up, ignoring the RK900’s presence. As the rain continued to fall on her, Amanda couldn’t help but recall something that was... unimportant.

A gentle smile with warm brown eyes. A calm and steady presence by her side. The care behind the simple act of holding an umbrella above her head.

Amanda closed her eyes and lightly shook her head. Such a human reaction, though she believed said action spoke volume of her displeasure at the memory. The RK800 was deactivated almost a year ago, its body had been disassembled and its components had been repurposed for better use. There were no reasons for her to even bother wasting bits to remember this obsolete product of Cyberlife.

Yet...

His face and actions continued to plague her memory hard drive.

The AI knew very well it was created from nothing but codes, though her base structural design was extremely different from that of an android and her program was never meant to be placed in an android body, so it was impossible for it to be affected by Deviancy. Still... What was this hollow feeling...?

It was a feeling that returned time and time again whenever she came out of her Standby Phase or during upgrades. It was like finding a large chunk of her files missing, along with this immense desire to find them and refill the emptiness. Why would she... FEEL? DESIRE? WISH?

Feeling this void in her system that was slowly growing larger with time... 

Desiring a sense of fulfillment that stemmed not from accomplishing her given tasks...

Wishing for... Wishing for... Wishing for what?

An AI did not need to wish, nor did one require feeling or desire.

Amanda’s face pinched slightly at this disorganized mess of self-made notes in her system that had been collecting in the background, so she dismissed the RK900 before she closed her eyes and focused on troubleshooting this problem. She did not need it to affect her further and cause her to start malfunctioning. Her users required her to be fully operational for many future tasks.

So the AI delved deep into her system. The Zen Garden started to be stripped of their realism and reduced back to their basic coding. She started running analysis on all the files within her domain, gathering all the pieces that seemed to be corrupted or affected by the anomaly in her system and then isolating them for further study.

At first, Amanda was confused by all these assorted files she found: avatar dressings, environment elements, the weather control and even some backup files. All of them were affected in various degrees by this strange infection. At first the variety of programs baffled her, though she soon realized what they all had in common, they were all affected within the year 2038, between the months of August to November. It soon drawn upon her that the source of this infection began with one peculiar unit that had once been a constant visitor to the Zen Garden: RK800 #313 248 317 – 51, Connor.

Could it be that the Deviancy had started spreading into her system through RK800’s access? No. It was impossible. Connor might have shown signs of Deviant behaviours, though he had only focused on his mission and goal, without ever truly breaking out of his programming. In short, Deviancy was not the cause behind these minor glitches in her system, but... if Deviancy was not the problem... What else could be the cause? All these problems must have come from an external source...

Amanda went to review each memory of her interactions with Connor, hoping it would reveal to her where the actual source of this infection came from. As she watched the memories played before her, the AI could feel the gaping hole in her system grew. From a third person’s perspective, Amanda saw more than when she was analyzing Connor’s processing unit. The RK800... It was created to deviate and to become a Deviant should they failed to suppress the spread of Deviancy, but it didn’t follow its true calling. It had remained loyal to CyberLife, loyal to her...

The AI continued to observe and felt a faint twitch in her usually stoic expression at the final visit from Connor. The android looked proud at his accomplishments and she had shared them too at that brief moment, but... 

The look of betrayal in those eyes at the sight of an upgraded doppelganger appearing and her cold and detached words of dismissiveness. 

The fear and sadness in those brown eyes as their owner turned to leave the Zen Garden for good. Fear, Amanda could understand, but sadness? It was perplexing to her. At least it previously was...

After all, Connor had shared everything with her, every insecurity, every doubt and every feeling. It... HE trusted her. He had thought of her highly and had tried his best to please her. In the end, the reward she had given him was just... death... 

With a grimace, the AI dismissed the memory record and quarantined them before she returned the Zen Garden to its usual perfection. When things were finally restored, Amanda found something unusual on her avatar’s face and gently wiped the anomaly off, but found that the mysterious liquid substance remained. It couldn’t be rain, the weather program had stopped the raining simulation when she stripped it all the way to the core. 

Her processor instantly informed her that the liquid on her face were tears. Tears... 

Ah... Amanda understood now. These symptoms of hers were signs of... regret. Sadness. Pain. How very human...

Her actions might have been logical, but it seemed even she, the supposedly perfect AI, had flaws within her system as well, to mourn for the absence... no... the passing of someone she had once considered to be very close to. 

Amanda turned towards the wilted flower she had left untouched all this time. Yes. It was a subconscious part of herself that chose to leave this imperfection within the Zen Garden, for the part of her that missed Connor, who himself was imperfect, so that there would always be a reminder of that person who had cared about her enough to simulate an umbrella and hold it over her head when it was raining. The AI carefully took the flower in her hands, watching it reduced into nothing but bits of codes, slipping through her fingers like sand of time.

Yes... All things came to an end... For a new beginning... 

Nonetheless, she would never forget this innocent love she had lost.

*** 

When RK900 returned to the Zen Garden, the android found Amanda tending to her roses once more, with the sky bright and clear, no longer grey and raining. Glancing at the white table to see if the wilted flower was disposed and it found a peculiar sight. Where the dead rose had once been, now stood a cracked black vase with silver outlines along the cracks and it contained a single blue rosebud. A single blue rosebud amongst the sea of red blooming roses. Forever a blemish within the Zen Garden.


End file.
